- Forgive your ex for whatever they have done to hurt you. Everyone is hurt in a divorce, but hanging on to hurt will just damage your ability to work together and heal.
- Let your anger go! You must do whatever it takes to not be angry at your ex anymore. Find constructive ways to get your anger out. (e.g., forgiveness, prayer, counseling, exercise, yoga, meditation, talking to friends or your pastor, etc.)
- You have to understand that you will never be able to change your ex. They are who they are, and you will not change that. The sooner you can accept them for who they are, the better.
- You have to negotiate, and understand that you will not always have things your way. They will have their suggestion, you have yours, and you go back and forth until you meet somewhere in the middle.
- Email is the best form of communication if there is a lot of tension between you two. Everything is documented and you don’t have to have a verbal argument this way.
- If you have children understand that your time with your child is a gift. It is your time. Appreciate every minute of it.
- Determine what goals you want for yourself. Now is a great time to focus on YOU! Find something to help you feel grounded and give you purpose (Run a race, write a book, start a new hobby, join a social group of interest, volunteer, change or add a career).
- Learn about mindfulness and meditation. Google it. Research it. Read some books about it. Take a class. Understand that mindfulness and meditation aren’t weird, they are excellent tools to help you deal with stress.
8 Tips to Help You Get through Divorce
